The Birds and The Bees
by ScarlettLetters
Summary: Post BD. Their little girl is growing up. Will anyone survive? Various POVs - MAY09: More scenes might be written for this. They are in my head, but I don't know if they'll make their way to the page.
1. Chapter 1

**Title: The Birds and the Bees**

**Author: ScarlettLetters**

**Summary: Post-BD. Their little girl is growing up. Will anyone be able to survive? **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. All recognizable characters belong to Stephenie Meyers and that's a good thing because I never would have been creative enough to come up with all the Twilight Universe amazingness.**

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**BPOV**

I knew I was wearing a groove in the floor from all my pacing, but I was so worried about how Edward would take the news I had to tell him. Where the hell were they? The boys had gone on a hunting trip to 'blow the estrogen' off them according to my brother-in-law Emmett. They were due back this morning, but it was now nearing late afternoon and I hadn't been able to reach Edward on his cell. He knew how much I worried about him when he was away, but as I tried to calm myself and focus on the real problem at hand I heard the crunch of tires on our gravel road. Finally.

Taking a deep breath I smoothed my hair and my rumpled shirt. Emmett's booming voice reached me first as he rumbled through the door and bellowed out to his wife.

"Rosie, baby! I'm hooome! Come slap some sugar on me, hot stuff."

That man certainly had a way with words. He gave me a quick peck on the cheek as he flew up the stairs to wrap a very happy Rosalie up in a deep hug and carry her back to their room, their lips locked in a passionate kiss.

I had barely turned around when a whir of white and black flew past me and slammed into Jasper, who was at the door awaiting her arrival. He picked Alice up and as they covered each other in kisses he quietly whispered sweet nothings into her ear as he calmly walked up the stairs with her.

I knew Edward would be expecting a similar greeting from me, but I was just too concerned with what had transpired during his absence.

"Hello, Beautiful." He smiled as his eyes caught mine. He was next to me in a flash and had me wrapped in his arms.

I smiled gently up into those golden orbs I adored and gently placed my lips to his.

I had to laugh at myself with all the worry I did prior to my change about what our touches would be like. If I had only known they would be so much more electrifying now that we were both vampires I would have saved myself a lot of time and energy. I worried over nothing. Kissing Edward was something I could most certainly spend eternity doing.

"I've missed my girls." Edward murmured into my hair. "I hate being away from you."

I rested my head on his glorious chest. "We missed you too. It's not the same without you with us."

He pulled back from me and lifted my chin so he could gaze into my eyes.

"Love, what's wrong?"

He might not be able to hear my thoughts, but there wasn't another being who knew me better than my husband. Even after five years of being married it sometimes still shocked me that he was so completely in tune with me. Letting out a deep sigh I led him to the couch and sat him down.

"Bella, what is it? You're scaring me. Where's Nessie? I can't hear her. What's..."

"Calm down, Edward. Nessie is fine. She and Jacob went into town to see a movie."

"There is something though, isn't there."

"Yes."

Edward let out a low growl. "What did the dog do?"

I rolled my eyes. As much as Edward had come to accepting Jacob's imprinting on Renesme, he still took every opportunity to assume the fatherly position of no man being good enough for his beloved daughter.

"Jacob did nothing wrong. This is about Nessie."

I saw the fear flash in his eyes and actually winced when his hands closed around my arms.

"You told me she was fine. Dear god, Bella, what happened to my baby?"

I had to let out a small laugh. I had come to the realization that Edward's melodramatics would be something I would have to deal with for the rest of eternity, but the were still funny at times.

"You're laughing? Bella, please, what's going on. You're torturing me."

"I'm sorry, my love. I'm just trying to figure out the best way to tell you this. I don't mean to prolong the suffering you're feeling." I knew I would just have to tell him straight out.

"Edward, our daughter is now a woman."

I watched his face as the confusion set in. I could see him working those words around in his mind to figure out their meaning.

"Where exactly are they?" He let out in the most menacing of tones.

"I told you, Edward, they went to see a movie."

He stood up and let out a roar that brought all of our family racing into the room.

"What the hell is going on?" Emmett yelled as he was buttoning his jeans, his hair and shirt a rumpled mess.

"We're going mutt hunting." Edward stated looking at his brothers. They began to move to the door.

"Edward, stop! Calm down!" I demanded.

Edward turned to me and focused his pitch black eyes on me.

"Calm down?! Calm down?! Bella, how can you even think that I would be calm at such news. You let that mongrel take my precious daughter to a dark theater after he...he...he deflowered her? I'll kill him. I'll rip him into the smallest of pieces and enjoy watching each and every one of them rot!"

I stood there with my mouth hanging open. How had I messed this up so badly?

"Jacob has not 'deflowered' Nessie."

Edward looked at me with confusion. "You just said..."

"I just said she was a woman. I was trying to find a delicate way to tell you that...Nessie...she got her period."

**AN: This is my first Twilight fic. The idea came to me and I had to get it out. I don't plan on it being very long, but I do want to get some humor in here with the various talks that will happen between the 'parents' and the 'kids'. Hope you enjoy, please tell me if you like it.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I own nothing you recognize, Stephenie Meyer does.**

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**EPOV**

My darling Nessie was menstruating.

My family's thoughts began to bombard me.

_I don't see anything you should worry about. Eww, I hope I never see my little niece like that. She's still a baby to me, although Jacob is a really good looking guy. Not my type, but still..._

I rolled my eyes. Alice was always good for taking her thoughts a step too far.

_She's a good girl, Edward. I have never felt anything remotely lustful from her or Jacob._

_Blood-sucking pups! Cool!_

"Emmett!" I growled.

_Wonder if she would have a litter?_

I lunged at my idiot brother and slammed him to the wall. I let out a snarl and all the oaf could do was laugh.

"Sorry, bro. I'll behave."

I shot him a glare before I released him. Luckily Rose gave him a well earned slap to the back of the head as he returned to her side.

"What?" He asked sheepishly.

"I can only imagine what you thought." Rose huffed, crossing her arms sternly. If there was anyone in my family who was more protective of Nessie than I was, it was most assuredly her Aunt Rosalie.

_This is a development we will need to discuss, son. I was never sure what would happen with Renesme's reproductive system. It seems reasonable, she's in her adolescent phase._

I was not prepared for this. My baby. In the years since her birth Bella, Nessie and I had formed a tight family unit. The mutt's presence was always something I had to swallow, but he cared for Nessie enough to realize she needed time with just her mother and I. Bella's pregnancy was so difficult and until I was able to hear Nessie's thoughts I would have done anything to free Bella's body of the horrible burden I had placed upon it, but since Bella's change and Nessie's arrival, the love the three of us shared had only grown and become our true sustenance.

"Edward?"

I turned to see my beautiful wife. Her face was strained with worry. I had to relieve her fears. Drawing her close I kissed her gently.

"I'm sorry, my dearest. I overreacted. I apologize for my outburst. Can you forgive me?"

"You know there is nothing to forgive. I'm sorry I wasn't clearer. I was just so worried about your reaction to Nessie's news that I didn't think about what else my words could mean."

Bella's words. _Our daughter is now a woman._ Lord, help me.

_What does a vampire call a used tampon?_

"EMMETT!!"

**JPOV**

As I sat next to my Nessie in the dark theater watching the light from the screen reflect off her glorious skin I couldn't help but think of the future. Since Nessie's birth I knew my life and being were so completely bound to her that nothing else had mattered. Protecting her was my sole purpose, but I still had to find something to pass the time so I started a garage with Seth and Leah. Seth helped me out with the cars and Leah ran the business. When I had to give Nessie and her folks some space that's where I went. I didn't like being away from her, but I knew that we had the rest of existence to be together when she was fully grown.

With Nessie developing so quickly mentally she was thrilled with her new physical changes. To an outsider Nessie looked about fourteen and a stunning fourteen-year old at that. Her long bronze curls now reached just above her waist and felt like silk as I gently ran my fingers through them. Her bottomless brown eyes were able to suck you into their depths and make you never want to leave. She had not only inherited her father's grace but resembled him physically as well. Nessie was tall. She was just over 5'9" and was a stick of a girl. We had brushed off several offers from modeling agents who had seen her on our travels around the world. We knew we couldn't draw attention to our strange little group like that. I, of course, had continued to phase so I still looked the same as the day she was born.

Our relationship was unique to say the least. We both knew we loved each other, but we were careful with how that love was shown. Luckily I didn't have to resist any urges with her because I just didn't feel that way about her right now. I talked to Quil a lot about this as Claire was now seven and he was still there for her in every way. I expected him to be a little jealous of how fast Nessie was growing and what that meant for her and I in the next few years, but like always, he was just happy living life and making sure Claire was cared for.

I thought about what had happened this morning with Nessie getting her, you know, monthly visitor. She had let out a small shriek when she had gone into the bathroom to get ready for the day. Bella and I had been at the door immediately and heard her calmly ask for Bella to come in. I paced back and forth nervously as I they talked in that damn vampire speak, so fast and low that I wasn't able to understand. I heard the cottage door open and saw Alice come around the corner with a grocery bag.

"Morning, Clifford." She sang to me.

"Tinkerbell." I offered back. This was our thing, she'd call me various well known dog names and I'd fire back with a shot to her diminutive stature. It was weird to think about her as my friend, being that she was my mortal enemy, but the Cullen's had more than proved themselves to me and my pack as well as the La Push pack. "What's in the bag?"

"Something I saw Nessie needing."

"That's all I get?"

"She'll tell you when she's ready, Mr. Nosy Pants. This isn't my news to tell." She sang in that irritating bell-like voice.

I gave her a low growl as she knocked gently on the door. "Auntie Alice is here. Open up."

The bathroom door opened and she disappeared inside. What the hell was going on in there? I was getting really pissed when Bella slipped back out.

"Bells. What is it? She's OK, right? Why'd she scream?"

Bella smiled at me and placed her hand on my skin. I had gotten used to the cold and the fact she smelled terrible, she'd always be my best friend.

"She's fine, Jacob."

"Fine? How can she be fine? What did Alice have in the bag?"

"Go sit down, Jake. She'll be out in a few minutes."

I headed off to the small living room as Bella went back into the bathroom. What the hell is it with chicks and bathrooms? How can they all pile in there and do their business together? It's just so weird. I only had to wait a few minutes more before the three of them came out. Bella had her arm wrapped around Nessie's waist, the kid did tower over her by almost half a foot, and I saw the biggest shit eating grin plastered on Nessie's face.

I gave her a questioning look and she laughed.

"Sorry, Jacob. I didn't mean to scare you. I was just surprised."

"Surprised by what? Would someone please tell me what's going on?" I pleaded.

Alice was practically getting ready to launch into orbit she was buzzing so fast, but before she could say what she wanted Nessie beat her too it.

"I got my period!"

Oh, shit...

**EPOV**

I was sitting on the small front porch of the cottage waiting for Nessie and the mutt to return from the movie. I knew exactly how long it should take for them to get back from Port Angeles so they should be arriving shortly. I felt my phone buzz and I looked down to see I had received a text from Alice.

_They will be there in one minute. Be nice. Resist the urge to be a drama queen._

Why did my family always think I would turn to melodrama? I slowly let out a long sigh and prepared myself for a conversation that up until an hour ago I never let myself think about having.

I smelled the dog just as I heard their thoughts.

_Daddy, I know Mom told you, so please, please, please don't embarrass me!_

_Oh great, Edward's back._

The resulting growl wasn't one I could control.

"Edward, you promised." I heard Bella remind me from inside our cottage.

I felt my darling daughter's arms wrap around me as she placed a kiss on my cheek.

"I missed you, Daddy. Did you have a good time?"

Nessie had learned that by calling me 'Daddy' she could get almost anything she wanted. I had to laugh at the little trick she most likely picked up from her mother. Bella only used 'Daddy' on Charlie when the situation were dire during her human years.

"I missed you too, my angel. Your uncles were entertaining to say the least. Why don't you go inside, I'd like to speak to Jacob for a moment."

"Why don't we all go inside? We could tell you about the movie we just saw and..."

"Inside, Renesme." I said sternly. I wasn't going to be deterred from what I had to say to the damn dog.

_Chill, leech. Heh. Chill...that's a good one._

I shot a glare in his direction and opened the door to show Nessie inside.

"It's OK, Ness. Go inside. I'll be there in a few." Jacob whispered into her hair and gave her a small kiss.

Nessie stalked past me and squinted her eyes.

_Don't be a jerk, Dad. This isn't a big deal. If you're mean to him I'll be so mad at you!_

I pinched the bridge of my nose. She really was a teenager.

"Look, Edward..."

"No! You be silent. I'm speaking here." I demanded.

I saw him bristle at my tone and command, but dammit, I am her father. He has to respect my role.

"This changes things, Jacob."

"How?" I could see the incredulous look on his face.

"We don't know the extent of her development, we have to be careful."

"_We_ don't have to be anything. You're jumping the gun as usual. Take the knot out of your panties and just relax."

I could hear Nessie's snicker from just inside the door and I let out a snarl. This was not a joking matter.

"Jacob..."

"Edward, look. You of all people should know my feelings for Nessie. Just because she's...uh...growing up, doesn't mean either of us are ready for that kind of relationship. Imprinting doesn't work like that. I know Nessie and while someday we'll get there, we're not there yet."

I was paralyzed at the thought of my daughter lying with this mongrel, but I had to maintain for the sake of my family.

"Heed my words, Black. You touch her before I say it's OK and they will be finding pieces of you for years to come, treaty or no."

_Daddy!_

I watched as Jacob started to shake and twitch. I knew this wasn't easy for him either, but I had to assert my position as the head of my family. His imprinting wasn't my concern. My daughter was too precious to not have my feelings be known.

_Her safety means everything to me, you know that, leech. Don't make this a fight you won't win._

I turned as the door to the cottage opened allowing Bella and Nessie to step between us.

"This conversation is over now. Jacob, we'll see you in the morning. Come inside, Edward." Bella glared at me.

"Fine. Nessie, come inside."

_I'm going to say goodnight to Jake. Alone!_

I clenched my fists against my legs and walked into the house, closing the door behind me. Bella pulled me into a hug when the thought assaulted me.

_She is becoming a serious hottie. I'm glad she got Bella's lips._

Damn mutt.

**AN: OK, that was more drama than I have planned for the rest of the story, but come on, no conversation between Edward and Jake would be angst free. Thanks for the nice reviews and adds. I'm having fun with this. Don't you just love Emmett?**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews and the adds/favorites!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing you recognize, Stephenie Meyer does.**

oOoOoOoOo

**NPOV**

I woke up to the sound of my mother's giggle. Great...my parents were feeling frisky. Over the past year I had started going up to the main house on my own in the mornings to give them some privacy. Being half vampire gave me a heightened sense of hearing and it really was so gross being able to hear your parents do "it". I threw my covers off, grabbed some clothes and made my way to the bathroom. After being so excited yesterday, I was starting to regret my humanity a little bit. I hated being the only human Cullan at times, even if it was just half. It was strange the things that I experienced versus things I did not. I've never been sick a day in my life and I've only ever sneezed a few times, but Uncle Emmett was to blame for that. He liked to experiment on me, to the ire of Dad and Grandfather, but we did find out that if pepper was blown up my nose I would indeed sneeze it out.

I quickly braided my long, curly hair and did what I had to do to finish making myself presentable for the day and made my way out of the cottage. Grabbing my cell phone off the charger I told my parents I was headed to see the family. Their muffled goodbyes told me they wouldn't miss me too much. I decided to take my time and enjoy the walk up to the house. I could have used my vampire speed, but I wasn't in a hurry, I had some things I needed to figure about. Sliding open my cell I pressed an autodial button and listened as my call was connected.

"Good morning, dear."

"Hello, Grandfather."

"You sound worried. What is troubling you?"

"You know that I...uh, yesterday..."

My grandfather's chuckle made me smile. "Your menses. Yes, I heard. Are you feeling poorly? Cramping?"

"Um, no. No, I'm fine. I was just wondering about the blood. I mean I know none of you thirst for me, but I didn't know if...oh, gosh, this is really embarrassing, Grandfather. Everyone is going to be able to smell it and I don't want it to be uncomfortable for anyone."

"Renesmee, it will be fine. We've been interacting with humans for a long time and yours is not the first menstrual cycle this family has had to deal with."

"Oh, right, Mom."

"Yes and besides, the blood released during this time is for all intents and purposes dead and honestly not very appetizing."

"Yeah, that would be sort of disgusting."

My grandfather laughed and told me he'd see me when I arrived at the house. I ended my call and hurriedly placed another one.

"Hi." The deep, sleepy voice greeted me.

"Hi, yourself."

"I miss you."

"I miss you too, Jacob. Sorry I woke you."

"You know I never care what time you call. Did you sleep OK?"

"Yeah, fine. I'm heading up to the house right now, giving the parentals some 'alone time'."

Jacob laughed. "Want me to come over now?"

"Actually I thought I'd hang out a little bit and then maybe you could take me for a ride?" Riding with Jacob on his motorcycle was one of my favorite things to do. My dad still wouldn't let me get my own, he said we could possibly talk about it when I was fully grown, but he had finally caved into at least letting Jacob take me after mom and the rest of my family had given him such a hard time about not letting me grow up. I loved my dad, but seriously, getting him to take the stick out of his butt wasn't always the easiest thing to do.

"Sure. I'll be over in a few hours, OK?"

"Yes! Thank you, Jacob."

"Anything for you, Nessie. You know that."

I smiled at the love in his voice. Jacob had been a part of my life from the beginning. I could only ever remember my existence with him in it. His imprinting was just as strong of a pull for me as it was for him and recently we both recognized that it was starting to evolve. With me getting my period, a possible outcome for my future was only made that much more confusing.

"I know. Love you."

"Love you too, sweets. Bye."

I closed my phone just as I came to the back door of the giant white house that had been my second home for my whole life. My family had never planned on staying in Forks this long, but because of Grandpa Charlie and Jacob's connection to me they had all made concessions. My aunts and uncles had all transferred to University of Washington and drove into Seattle for classes, not that they minded the drive, to keep up appearances. We were going to have to figure out something new after this year as they would all be graduating. I knew my mother wanted to go to college but both of my parents had stayed home with me since I was born. 'You'll only be my little girl for so long,' Mom told me when I asked her why she didn't go with them. It made me smile to think I hadn't been her 'little' girl for over a year now since I went through a major growth spurt. My dad stayed home because he didn't like to be without my mother and I. I was thrilled to hear he was going on the trip last week so Jake and I could have some time without him hovering. I let out a long sigh. I've know that my dad was going to be the major issue in my future with Jacob forever and that future that just got a little cloudier.

It was times like these I really wish Aunt Alice could see what would happen with us. Her visions regarding me were always in conjunction with someone else, Jake's being a werewolf didn't allow for her to see anything with us, but she could see me when I interacted with another member of our family. It was like they filtered out the weird block I had on her too. I shook off my frustration as I entered the kitchen that was only used to prepare food for Jacob and I. There were actually very few human foods I could stand to eat, basically fruits and vegetables, which made Uncle Emmett laugh at the irony that I was a 'vegetarian vegetarian'." I saw my grandmother at the blender making me a smoothie.

"Good morning, my love. How did you sleep?"

I kissed her gently on the top of her head and wrapped her in a hug. I loved my grandmother Esme a ridiculous amount. Besides my mother I knew no gentler of a soul.

"Fine. Mom and Dad needed to "be alone" so I thought I'd come see everyone up here."

"I heard you talking to your grandfather and I thought you'd enjoy some breakfast."

"Thanks." I sipped the concoction and took my best guess. This was a game of ours.

"Bananas. Pineapple, orange, and...passion fruit?"

"Something else too." She smiled devilishly.

I took another sip and set the glass down. "Star fruit?"

Her tinkly laugh filled the kitchen. "You're getting to be too good for this game. I'll have to try to keep getting more exotic fruits to fool you somehow."

"Who knew you were so sneaky, Grandmother?"

Just as I was about to tease her a bit more I was swept off my feet and thrown into the air. I flipped around in the air and managed to land on the counter before having my legs grabbed by my Uncle Emmett's tree trunk arms as I was tossed over his shoulder and he took off at vampire speed toward the backyard.

"Emmett!" A chorus of voices called out.

He sat me on the ground and straighted my clothes. "She's fine! You guys worry too much about her. You're fine, right, Ness?"

"Of course." I said punching him gently in the gut.

"Nice flip on the counter, kid. I'm impressed." I turned to see my Uncle Jasper making his way out to us with the rest of my smoothie with a proud grin on his face. "Your grandmother says to drink this before any more roughhousing." He said handing me my breakfast.

"Oh, man. No fair! Now I can't bug her until she digests that stuff."

Jasper and I let out loud laughs at the memory of the last time Uncle Emmett decided to treat me like a rag doll after I had eaten human food. Aunt Rosalie had to hose him off in the yard as none of the women would let him in the house covered in my vomit. I tipped the glass to my mouth and started chugging.

"So, Nessie, how's it feel to be a woman?" Emmett asked me with a wide smile showing off his deep dimples.

I spit my drink out all over my Uncle Jasper and that brought Emmett to his knees as he doubled over in hysterics. I couldn't even get an apology out before Jasper had Emmett by his ankles and was tossing him into the forest. The loud crack of Emmett smashing into a tree rang out. We heard him laughing as he started back our way.

"I'm so sorry, Uncle Jasper!"

"It wasn't your fault, sweetheart. Your lug head Uncle Emmett just enjoys his pranks a little too much." He smiled as he removed his shirt to wipe the fruit mess from his face.

I had seen my Uncle Jasper without a shirt on before, but I could feel my blush, a curse from my mother, start to bloom. I saw his eyes flick to my face as he felt my emotions and before I knew it I felt a wave of relaxation.

"Thanks. Sorry again."

"It's alright. I apologize. I think we are all having a hard time remembering you are experiencing an adolescent phase. I'm going to go put clean this off me and then Emmett and I are going to go hunt. Would you like to join us?"

"Yeah, sure." I agreed as Emmett came jogging back to where we were as Jasper disappeared into the house.

"Cool, we haven't hunted with you in awhile."

"You're not going to give me a hard time about me 'being a woman' are you?" I had learned over the years that being blunt with my Uncle Emmett was really the best way to communicate.

"Oh come on, you know I only tease you out of love."

"Yeah, I could do with a little less of that kind of love, thanks."

He stuck his bottom lip out in a pout. Ugh, he was so frustrating sometimes, he knew I couldn't stand members of my family to not be happy.

"Just do your best to keep it at an absolute minimum, OK? I wouldn't want you to burst a vessel or something trying to hold 'your love' in."

He let out a bark of laughter and moved to tackle me but I sidestepped him just as Uncle Jasper jumped off his back and sent him sprawling across the yard. I shook my head at their constant need to act like little boys.

"Can we go hunt please?" I sulked.

With a nod we all took off for the woods. I was able to move as fast as most of the females in my family so my uncles kept the pace manageable for me. We caught the scent of a herd of deer quickly and we each targeted our kills. I drank from a young buck and felt sated. I quickly disposed of the body and made my way back to the edge of the field to wait for Jasper and Emmett to be finished. I was starting to daydream about my upcoming ride with Jacob, imagining myself sitting behind him with my arms wrapped tightly around his waist and my head laying on the back of his shoulder when I heard them coming my way.

"You're going to make me a liar, Nessie."

I looked at my Uncle Jasper questioningly. "Sorry?"

"I told your father I had never felt any feelings like that come from you."

"I...I was just thinking about going on a ride with Jacob, it wasn't that big of a deal."

I saw Emmett begin to shake his head. "Mmm hmmm, sure. Don't question the empath, missy. If Jasper felt something, you were feeling it. OK, I didn't want to have to do this, but I think it's time. Nessie, when man and a woman love each other very, very much, or werewolf and a half human, half vampire in your case..."

"WHOA! Stop, Uncle Emmett. Really, stop! I'm not thinking about loving Jacob 'very, very much'."

Oh my lord, if it was possible for me to die I would drop right here. My crazy Uncle Emmett wanted to give me the sex talk. I felt a wave of calm wash over me and I gave Jasper a weak smile.

"I just want you to be aware, Nessie. I know you have the indestructible vampire thing going for you, but I don't think you and Jake should really go there quite yet."

"Well thankfully Jacob and I aren't thinking about that. I can't even believe I am talking about this with the two of you."

"Look, Nessie, I think what Emmett is trying to say is that with your new, uh, development, that we are all having to consider some new realities. We just want you to be safe. We love you."

"Yeah, what he said."

I had to chuckle. Emmett might not be a smooth as Jasper, but he certainly loved me.

"Look, Uncles, I know it's been hard to deal with my overdeveloped mental capacity compared to my physical appearance and now things seem to be catching up on that end, but Jacob and I aren't romantic with each other."

"Yet. Oh man, can you imagine when Edward catches the first dirty thought Old Yeller, I mean Jake, sorry Ness, has? That's something I have to witness. We might actually see Edward tear his own head off!"

"Nice, Emmett. Don't be an idiot. Renesmee, just take things slow with Jacob as your human hormones start to mature. I'll do the best I can to keep things calm, I know your grandfather wants to talk to you as well."

"Getting my period just keeps getting better and better. What, am I going to have to talk to everyone about this?"

"Oh yeah, that reminds me watch out for your Aunt Rosie and the pixie. I heard them saying they wanted to take you shopping."

I thought how wonderful it would be for the earth to just open up and swallow me. My aunts would be ruthless. Jasper laughed and pulled me into a hug.

"We love you, kid. We only want to make sure you're safe."

I knew that my family felt they were completed when my mom married my dad, but since I was born I had changed all of their lives more than they had ever thought possible. Jasper's connection to me was especially strong. We had such an intense bond because of my insatiable thirst for knowledge. We talked for hours on end about any and every topic. I was one of the few in our family who felt comfortable enough to spend any amount of time in his study, it was actually my favorite room in the main house. His ability to show me physical affection was a huge development for him. His loving me had also allowed him to finally close the gap between the rest of the family he had felt since he and Aunt Alice had joined.

"I know, but I really need you guys to promise that you won't tease me and Jacob, or my dad," I said with a pointed look at Emmett as his face fell, "about this."

"We promise. Right, Emmett."

"Yeah, OK. Promise."

I was preparing to give Emmett a glare to drive my point home like Aunt Rosalie taught me when my phone buzzed. I knew it would be Jacob.

"Hey." I couldn't help the smile that now was plastered on my face.

"I'm leaving for your place now. Am I meeting you at the main house?"

"Yeah, out front."

"OK, I'll see you in about twenty minutes."

"Great."

"You're not alone are you? Vampire ears can hear me."

I glanced up to see my uncles pretending to have a conversation.

"Yep. The uncles."

"Hey guys."

The mumbled a hello and I had to laugh.

"They say 'hi'."

"See you soon, cutie."

"Bye, Jacob." I said softly.

I closed the phone and looked back at my uncles to see Emmett shaking his head.

"Nessie," he laughed, "you are in so much trouble."

I rolled my eyes, but I couldn't help finding myself agreeing with him.


End file.
